So many people are jumping on the “blogging” and page owner bandwagon it’s hard to find someone who is real. I found myself inserted into a few page owner groups each having a different collection of bloggers and Facebook page owners. No two groups are the same. The Facebook world is a step above the high school bullshit. Barely, but the step is there.
We have publishers only the cool kids are allowed to blog for. Instead of feeling like an outcast and sitting alone, bloggers are bashing on each other when most of us are just trying to find our voices. Do they not realize how discouraging it is to be shunned for hanging out with this blogger and not that one? What if there is an amazing writer out there who doesn’t want to be lobbied into a clique? Maybe they want to be friends with everyone?
It doesn’t work like that, no matter how hard we all wish it did. So we fight, argue, and start pointless childish drama to try and get a word in edgewise. I’ve seen it and have unfortunately been part of it. As a blogger and writer, I value my privacy above almost anything else on the internet. My children are too young to read the things that I do, too young to see the things I see. If someone were to threaten my privacy, my childrens’ safety, I’m sure I’d shut it down. Thankfully I haven’t had that issue just yet. Only people that want to support me.
I’ve witnessed a friend go through having her name used as a hashtag and publicly announced to the world who she is in real life. I tightened my settings after it happened. I cannot imagine what she went through having who knows how many people see her name. It could have linked back to her children and her soldier.
This incident caused her friends to rally around her for support. Luckily she has those friends. What about the bloggers who do not have a support system. There are probably thousands of people on the internet trying out this writing thing and because they are unknown, they are not getting ANY attention. So they give up. I was one of those such people. While my writing started out as poetry, I had no supporters. Just people who thought it was decent enough to be posted on the random Facebook pages I was a part of. I have hundreds of things I have written over the years. Now I’m editing them and showing them to my friends. My Facebook friends at least. Having support means all the difference. I know I will probably never see my writings on one of the most famous sites because I’m not Facebook cool enough to be friends with the people who write such famous things.
I’m an introvert, I have people issues. I can’t just randomly send a message to any Facebook cool person, I’m too afraid of being treated like shit for inquiring if they would like to give me some tips on writing. I’m not rich so I cannot afford any of the writers’ workshops. I’m just slowly writing things and submitting them. Of course, I get more “sorry this doesn’t fit for us” than “this is great, we’re publishing it” but I keep trucking on, I keep fighting.
Some of my work has been noticed, but not a lot. I’m now sitting at the “Not a Loser” table instead of the “Who the Hell Are You” table. Maybe someday I will be Facebook famous. Until the day arises where I have thousands of followers and thousands of people who like my Facebook fan page, I will continue to write from my heart. The things I write about may not be for everyone, but they are for me. That is what counts, what matters. Staying true to myself no matter how prominent or unsung I am on the internet.
To those of you who are feeling the same way here are a few tips for you I’ve had to learn the hard way:
Stay true to yourself
Quit worrying about offending people
Tell the truth about the mundane
Write like you are having a conversation with a friend
Nothing beats “Googling” a question. You might find answers to questions you weren’t sure you were asking. Don’t be so afraid to reach out to people. How do you know if you will get along with another Facebook person if you never have the courage to say “Hello!”
Remember, you are your own worst critic. Try to get out of your own way.
The Queen's Soapbox 